tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-57573204589298922792024-02-07T07:27:39.115-06:00Whispers and Wishes: a little window into the world where i createwe all have a voice inside that encourages us to be greater than we believe ourselves to be. it urges us to nurture, create and wander. that voice speaks in whispers and we repeat its urgings as wishes-- I wish I had time to paint, to craft, to write... to whatever it is that we do that helps us become who we are. The journey is mostly private but the voice you hear is not very different from the one that speaks in me.
it is not about the destination but rather who you become along the wayWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.comBlogger131125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-38417730995446808522012-08-19T16:19:00.000-05:002012-08-19T16:19:34.156-05:00what works for me now... So... this week, which has been helacious has also brought about some really interesting things...
How about instead of asking Why? I ask What if?
How about instead of dreading all the things left to do, I celebrate what is accomplished?
How about remembering that everyone starts somewhere, and all those somewhere's are different and I'm not in a race, I'm on a journey?
How about moving past forgiving and into forgetting?
How about doing what works instead of repeatedly doing what doesn't in hopes that I will "work" in a way that isn't so different?
How about not just believing but saying out loud, "love is enough" (without adding the disclaimer that it has to be, because some days it's all I've got)
How about letting the things and people that are clamoring for my attention actually get some of it, instead of viewing them as a distraction?
I made art this week... I made art I like this week. I wrote this week. I wrote stuff that needed to see the light of day so that it would stop darkening my heart.
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This is a <a href="http://effywild.com/2012/08/19/swoon-2/">Swoon</a> post, because, I'm really loving what works. Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-70317588504914055862012-08-10T21:30:00.001-05:002012-08-19T19:50:25.215-05:0026 years later, this is how it feelsI need to preface this with a few things-- I'm busy getting myself entrenched in Effy Wild's Book of Days, using the word "surfacing" as my word for the year. This part of my story is the first time I ever fought my way back up to a place I could call me. As I'm flinging the mud in my own world again, this time in my life keeps revisitng to me to remind me that something good always comes from the hard stuff... that there is a reason you bring yourself to the place of breaking. And I think that this might be the definitive retelling of this part of my story... <strike>There is art that goes along with it, but the art and I are still making our way to see things the same way.
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Once upon a time, he was the center of my world. He was everything I ever wanted and the only thing I needed. He loved me… and I #loved# that he loved me, perhaps more than I loved him at all. My whole world shrank down to him—and how he saw me and what he wanted from me and how I could give him what he wanted. And he wanted all of me. In that space between loving him and losing me is where I found out how much “all of me” was. It was not just the breath I took, but that the taste of the air held only him… It was not just the clothes that II wore, but that they showed me as he liked to see me and liked to have me seen. I was his doll… and in that there is a truth I don’t love about myself—I liked it. I liked being the centre of his world until I learned the most important part about being someone else’s sun %-- it means that there is no you left for just yourself. So it meant that I pushed too hard to still be me… angry, aggressive, smart, a Moltov cocktail with a fuse ever hanging close to a flame. With all of me, I both gave and threatened to take away the absolute control. I pushed against the “be sweet for this, be sexy for that, be tough for the next thing, bend when I need it, break when I ask. Say yes. Say yes.”
So I said no. Sweet, but with smoldering make-up. Sexy, but in clothes so complicated to remove that by the time I was undressed neither of us cared about the sex anymore. Tough, but so removed that it made no difference if I was strong enough—no one dared get close enough to find out. And I bent… to not smoking in front of his friends, to wearing silk dresses to church, to not drinking beer with the boys, to being everything he wanted every minute he wanted me and nowhere in sight when he didn’t or I couldn’t be.
And I said no. And broke when he asked me, because I had said yes, and I didn’t know how I could say both, be both the girl who said yes and said no. I didn’t know that he needed more than he wanted, and that he hurt more than he loved.
And so my no was still yes, and I bent, back over the hood of his car, and I broke inside… but not the way I thought—I broke away from being the centre. I broke away from being the doll. The cigarette that I did not let fall from my hand lit the fuse on that Moltov cocktail and in time I exploded—away from him, out of my self, into the space where I began to really take me apart piece by piece and learn.
How to be sweet. How to be sexy. How to be tough… How to bend. How to break. And to say yes. Say yes.
I came up from that place a long time ago, and brought him back down into it once—to hurt him. To take me back. To make him say yes. Yes. And then no. And the sadness in his face when I took that no and twisted it into a yes that he physically could not control is the sadness that belonged to him and I simply returned. It was cruel. And it worked. I walked away that night with a hole in my heart that was no longer filled with shame, but with the space to begin to take on something new. In many ways, no one has ever known me better. In many ways, no one has ever touched me more deeply. In many ways, the connection between us is still as strong as it was. I forgave him. I forgave myself. He will always be a part of my story and I will always be thankful for the things I learned, though not always for the ways in which I learned them. . And, now, I will always be the girl who can say no and say yes.Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-30284660451603955022012-03-05T09:59:00.001-06:002012-03-05T10:25:12.649-06:00There is always another hill to climb... and a give-awayGood morning... and it is, really, a good morning. I woke, at 4:00 am, as I always do, though today I will work an overnight to try to get my store back in shape... to catch up and get a little ahead of the game and feel a bit more under control again. work has been both my saving grace and the bane of my existence for awhile now. I'm treading water in a position that challenges my skills and ways of doing things, and like anything "new" it forces me to change the way I've been doing things and to learn a new routine. I'm fine with that, but the learning curve, which includes a steep incline of failing before success, is difficult. I am looking forward to breathing room again, to the place where I feel that I am in control agaion. I know that that is an illusion-- that there is rarely any control of outside forces, but at least I'll have the illusion, and as you whoread me regularly know, I believe in the strength of illusions. On the home front, we've managed to hang on to the house, for at least the next year anyway-- we'll be dirt poor, but that is certainly not the worst thing that could come of all this. We are having to learn new ways of pulling together and tightening the belts, but we are doing it. And that, alone, is something amazing. All of the change and stress has made me crave silence and solitude which is hard to find as a mom, partner and manager... It is hard to find when the deepest parts of me also always want to reach out, be a part of something, matter. And it's an interesting journey to watch from outside of myself as I patch the cracks, find the things that work for me and become a little louder about my needs... I am used to not allowing anyone else to help or take care of me. I'm used to always being strong and in control (see above comments on illusions). I am stepping back a bit, letting things fall apart a little and seeing what in the wreckage are actually things I want to save... Interestingly enough, each of those things begins with me, and ends with me giving back... Planet You, finding my groove with work, being a better mom, having more peace at home, making more art. So there are plans in the works to take a week of vacation time and turn one room in the house into studio space for me, where I can create in an environment that is just for that. I am shedding the guilt of having taken over the diningroom, the breakfast nook and every other available square inch of space to create... I'll have my one place (though I still may need extra room to store supplies). I'm standing up for time to myself and the right to say No More... to work and at home. I'm talking more and more to my quiet self about what she really needs to thrive, because the thing about being Planet Kaere, just like being Planet You, is that it is still easy to simply do what we do instead of do what we desire. So, also on my list of actions to take is to stop keeping things I might need one day, and stop adding to the yardsale pile and have that yardsale instead. As I've been going through the house, trying to even make enough space to accomodate the Great Spare Bedroom takeover, I've come across quite a bit of "stuff" that is just-- MORE. So, for anyone who wants a little "more" in their world, I'm having a little giveaway... <br />
A priority mail medium sized box (or the equivalent if you are elsewhere in the world because priority mail to y'all is too expensive for me) filled with art/scrapbooking/mixed media/ journaling supplies. <br />
A five by eight journal<br />
an assortment of patterend paper and cardstock<br />
punchinella<br />
paper flowers<br />
assorted bling<br />
glass beads<br />
a box of coloured chalks (crayola) <br />
Maya Road chipboard book (I use mine as masks and stencils)<br />
an assortment of fibers (floss and ribbons) <br />
stickers and other adhesive embellishments. <br />
<br />
So here's how to enter (each action counts as an entry)<br />
1. Leave a comment on this blog post<br />
2. "like" <a href="http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Planet-You/249067551789225">Planet You on facebook<br />
</a> (and remember to leave me a comment saying that you liked it.)<br />
<br />
3. Subscribe to the newsletter (little button over on your right)<br />
4. Become a registered user at <a href="http://www.theplanetyou.com/shop">the Planet You shop </a>(no purchase required) (and make sure you leave a comment here telling me that you registered)<br />
<br />
I'll be collecting comments etc. until midnight, March 9, and I'll announce a winner sometime on Saturday. Your package will post on Monday the twelfth.Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-29540085704155471762012-02-28T09:02:00.000-06:002012-02-28T09:02:36.038-06:00Sometimes, you just have to jump...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRegpEwmsYV5ML0pVwXCHFBXN3GzMOTHwfxG6KlG_4yo0O3RZ9iWQ8nCG7Apgpf8cKCh3jYe9LdzMe3qbE9b3gSSC9BaJoTJnm8NfBiktrWVCYfINc-dPy_CzUNechQwfZ60uiZVU8RS1-/s1600/love+grows+here.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="240" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRegpEwmsYV5ML0pVwXCHFBXN3GzMOTHwfxG6KlG_4yo0O3RZ9iWQ8nCG7Apgpf8cKCh3jYe9LdzMe3qbE9b3gSSC9BaJoTJnm8NfBiktrWVCYfINc-dPy_CzUNechQwfZ60uiZVU8RS1-/s320/love+grows+here.JPG" /></a></div><br />
Wow... the emotional rollercoaster of the last few days has been extreme. The incredible sense of relief, the incredible sadness, love, fear, resolution, determination... you name it, I've been there. We're approaching the last few days of gathering information that will be the cornerstone of our decision to keep the house or walk away. In the past 48 hours, I've met with a bankruptcy attorney, called my family to tell them we are likely moving back, told my boss that I will be relocating in may, called home again to say that we might not have to leave, told my boss that I may not have to leave, and had quite a few conversationswith friends and coworkers about leaving. The thing here, behind all the rest of it, is that we have an SBA disaster loan that is, well, a disaster. But the crux of the change was telling the SBA that they could take the house-- to which they responded : um... no... we don't want to do that, let's see what we can work out. Now, it's not like we haven;t been asking them to work with us for the past six months, but this is the fist time we've simply said No More. If we don't fix the HVAC system the house will be unliveable come mid May, if we don't fix the plumbing (and resulting carpentry issues) problems, one bath day we'll find ourselves sitting under the house. If we continue to pay the SBA we can't do the repairs (and yes, doing them is still going to be a huge belt tightening pull on an already emaciated piggy bank) but it is mostly doable. It's been a lot of conversations about what is and isn't okay now, and what will and won't be okay in the future. It's been conversations about limits and how far past them we've already been pushed, are willing to continue being pushed, are incapable of being pushed anymore. It's been conversations about disappointment, shame, desire, blood from a stone, blood from a dream, and the incredible powers of belief, faith, and the universe. It has been moments of silent frustration at all the things that "could have been". Through it all has been a sense of peace, because those that love and care about us are gathering around us (physically and spiritually) with hugs and support and prayers and positive thoughts and the kindest words and gestures. To be told, so often, in the past few days that "We just want you to be happy and safe" has been such a relief as we've gone from calling to movers to putting on the brakes on having to leave has been the happiest and safest knowledge we've had in awhile. But I can breathe again. And by the end of the day today, I expect to know a whole lot more about how things are going to go, an yes, that could mean that we're back on the short list of packing it up and heading on out. And I appreciate all of you who are going though this ride vicariously. I'm sorry it is so DRAMA filled. I'm not a drama person, usually. But I do know that whatever comes, we'll be okay, and we are surrounded by people who love us and care about us. I know that no matter what happens, the world still needs more art and love and kindness. And i know that even when I least feel like it, giving more is the only way to make this world more resemble the one I believe in. <br />
<br />
Make something beautiful with your hands and your heart,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-13692994167799235132012-02-23T15:39:00.001-06:002012-02-23T15:42:34.014-06:00There will be time and time Enough...A million years ago, shortly after I stopped studying art and started studying language, I had a bit of a meltdown about writers who seemed to love obscurity for obscurity's sake... and then, I really did fall in love with TS Eliot...and that one line seems to always be at the center of my psyche... <br />
The world has been slowly pushing me into decisions, making the way to make things clear... and so after surviving a winter with no heat, we've hit the first day of 80 degrees and Joe decided to test the air... no such luck. The line iced over and at least he turned the unit off before we ended up with another ceiling flood. But this is the catalyst... because Joe and Sea will be miserable in the heat of the summer here-- and we haven't the ability to use a different type of cooling system... so while we are just barely scraping by with the changes the SBA has made to our house note, we simply cannot replace a six thousand dollar air unit. So, I'll spend these couple of days off making arrangements for moving the family back east... and see what comes from really shaking the tree... The thing is that as hard as things have been here, as difficult as work is, I love being here. I love this house and my job and my work family and all the life we've been building here. The thing is that I can't believe that I'm going to lose my house for want of a six thousand dollar repair... and a few thousand additional dollars a year... it is that small an amount, and that much riding on it. And I have a hard time wrapping my head around that. The thing is that with all the great things beginning to come into our lives, nothing is happening fast enough to stop this slow-motion trainwreck. I'm brave... always have been and hopefully, always will be... but I'm scared about this... about disappointing people and the emotional back lash of feeling like a failure. I'm afraid that this surrender will be the beginning of a series of surrenders back into a life i don't want to live. I know that there are choices here, and that at the end of every hour I am in control of those but I feel a bit adrift. So I'm sitting here with a glass of wine and a cigarette and eyes with barely contained tears, sniffling in my sadness at a good bye I'm not really desiring. I'm sitting here calling in my miracles, all at once, please. just this one more time (because keeping us alive through Hurricane Katrina might have taken all the miracles I had at that time) and accepting that sometimes even the RIGHT answer isn't the one we most want. But I'm really hoping that there are still just enough miracles left in my life to keep us in this life here, in our house. We've gone so far as to set up a <a href="http://www.microgiving.com/profile/slybob33">charity fund</a> which makes me feel both grateful and ashamed at the same time. I believe that there is answer that will not diminish us. I just don't know what it is yet. so I keep up with my Book of Days journal<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJTNn4ZLCJN1eXG9wnxIAsfsRHy-_nCtxysoQy6LZDo9paFr0_Z3DCA1HqvsRz0b3K5K8_z0ZsrEalvE2GT3oB0rIF0SvyoGbLedf_h6mP-kCg7wV4pMekBANqcxRqMi4_Mh2wcoZTMvXl/s1600/IMG_4051.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="240" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJTNn4ZLCJN1eXG9wnxIAsfsRHy-_nCtxysoQy6LZDo9paFr0_Z3DCA1HqvsRz0b3K5K8_z0ZsrEalvE2GT3oB0rIF0SvyoGbLedf_h6mP-kCg7wV4pMekBANqcxRqMi4_Mh2wcoZTMvXl/s320/IMG_4051.JPG" /></a></div><br />
and I still try to do my best at work, I work on the<a href="http://www.theplanetyou.com/shop">Planet You </a> shop and am still working on the upcoming <a href="http://theplanetyou.com">Planet You</a><br />
workshops. Life is going to go on and I'm going to continue to do my best to find my place in it and offer peace and kindness where I can. "The world will turn, at least that's what they say, we'll crash and burn it's hard to look away, these kinds of things are easier to say than do." -- Aimee Mann <br />
<br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-19991187307454720752012-02-14T19:35:00.000-06:002012-02-14T19:35:52.701-06:00On Love and suffering...So... it's St. Valentine's Day... and unlike most, I am drawn to the martyr images of St. Valentine... which are horrific but yet, strangely peaceful. Love is something that is easier to think about as puppy kisses, new baby smells, fuirst date stomach flutters. It is hard to remember that with love comes a certain and distinct amoun of suffering-- the pain we feel when those we love are hurting, the stretching of ourselves to allow room for another to really inhabit our lives, the plain day to day dealing with the little things that we don't even like about those we love... because yes... love doesn't erase that he leaves the toilet seat up, or he answers every question witha question... love simply makes room or the piler of dislikes to gather in a corner waiting to be swept away as part of the weekly chores. Real Love is work... it is commitment, and one that requires reaffirming. Real love is soul spreading-- which is awesome, in the truest sense of that word. Real love is worth more than just having one day dedicated to it... worth remembering and honoring every day. Real love is a blessing. In the midst of all the hardship I am facing... when it is easier to say "just forget this" and get out, I work hard every day not to just remember but to express my love for those in my life. <br />
<br />
Today-- don't just say I love you, make a pact with yourself to say it more often. <br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-34519070504095731732012-02-13T16:07:00.001-06:002012-02-13T16:07:44.604-06:00a little Reorganization at the Shop at Planet YouWhew... I've been on a getting organized kick... which is only just beginning to show as a more space and less clutter reward. In my efforts to pare things down, streamline my storage and cataloguing and generally make life a little easier and less stressful I decided to re-do the Shop at Planet You... which was NOT less stressful or easy, but I'm a technophobe, and I learn most things by failing at them the first, second, third or fiftieth time. But... here's the deal... if you haven't visited the <a href="http://www.theplanetyou.com/shop">Shop at Planet You</a>, come take a peek... Currently in stock are an assortment of Adirondack Paint Dabbers, Punchinella, Derwent Inktense Pencils, scrap paper grab bags, some Crafter's workshop Stencils, and soon to be available are Dylusions Ink sprays, and Crafter's Workshop Face Stencils... and psst... Next Week... the 7 Gypsies Binderie & adapter will be in stock (sorry, but no coupons allowed on this one). The next line I hope to be carrying is Golden Paints and Mediums... so keep an eye out for those!<br />
Domestic Shipping is built into the price of every item. No ugly surprises at checkout. I offer coupons about once a month (register for the newsletter to your right). Hope you're all busy making something beautiful wth hands and your hearts,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-50036204427880930912012-02-07T15:56:00.003-06:002012-02-08T18:17:05.091-06:00microgiving....so there's a website that allows you to set up your own <a href="http://www.microgiving.com/profile/slybob33">charity</a>... for now, we're there...Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-85140243598232646702012-02-04T18:22:00.001-06:002012-02-04T18:26:10.883-06:00as things go... (this is a long one)Well... here it is February.. we've survived the better part of winter with no heat in the house... had only a few plumbing disasters and still are keeping our fingers crossed with the A/C unit... living here in the humid south, lack of air is intolerable for the dog and the boys.. me, I can survive it, but the boys are miserable. I've been spending a lot of time lately thinking about making decisions (not actually making them, but thinking about the process and prompting) and I've firmly decided that I do not like it. I am a much happier camper when things just need to be done, versus having to decide what needs to be done, and then doing it. That does mean that I do spend an extraordinary amount of time waiting for the world to decide what needs to happen and then struggling to find a way to deal with the duties of the decision. I am sitting at the crossroads with losing my house and am finding it really hard to make a decision. I know that if I just throw in the towel now, we'll be able to move in June... but I'm just not ready to make that decision. I keep hoping that some little miracle will come along that will allow me to save my house and this life that I've spent so many years rebuilding. I keep putting all my good energies out into the world and keep praying that the return will come in time to save what I so desperately believe I want. But I'm also quite sure that if we have to leave this house and we have to start over again, that that will be okay, too. It is not what I want... and not what, when I close my eyes, I see for my life... but it is still a life I can live. So I keep busy making art, putting fun products in the <a href="http://www.theplanetyou.com/shop">Planet You shop </a> and I'm working hard at getting the next Planet You workshops ready for you. Sometimes what feels so very right in our heads or our hearts is still not quite right for the world... and that is where I am with the workshops right now. Making the jump from what is in my head to what goes out into the world is, at the moment, feeling like a great big huge flying leap across a rather treacherous chasm. It isn't. I KNOW that. But yes, even I have those little voices that say "no you can't" Perhaps because there are some rather large "No's" in my world at the moment, the little voice has more force than usual. Not more power, I won't give it that, but yes, more force. It is louder than usual; it talks for longer than usual, and it seems to be against just about everything instead of focusing on one or two things. The thing is, my little voice, the planet Kaere one, not the little nay-sayer, is a strong and sure voice. I love to share and give and I know that by doing both of those things, my voice only gets stronger. I know that the more of us there are, sharing our voices in whispers, or shouts, the better the world is. I know that I cannot make anyone else share, but I can give everyone the opportunity to be heard. I have to remember that I have to give that same opportunity t me. So... a bazillion years ago, the thing I wanted most was to write. I didn't really miss making art but I had trouble going a day without writing... once upon a time, I wrote some really wonderful stuff. I've lost most of it (due to the hurricane)and some of it reinvents itself in my head. Time to share a little... <br />
<br />
When you found me<br />
you touched me with<br />
bitter hands, unsung music,<br />
shattered images of dreams<br />
stillborn in your heart.<br />
You loved, lusted,(parry and thrust)<br />
with velvet cloaked destruction.<br />
<br />
When she found me<br />
bruised, bloodied, shaking<br />
but not shaken she said<br />
"For you, it is imperative:<br />
you must alwaysbe loved<br />
correctly. The wrong<br />
love will destroy you.<br />
<br />
When I found me<br />
a drop of poison <br />
poised yet on my lips,<br />
the glass pressed close <br />
to reveal no breath,<br />
No surrender so sweet<br />
This dead Juliet.<br />
<br />
<br />
so today, while the idea of making some art seemed like a good idea, I chose to go about a different way. <br />
<br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-7207916050439980532012-01-21T11:24:00.000-06:002012-01-21T11:24:27.880-06:00Book of Days and other such things...Ah, well... i'm finding my groove with Book of Days... making the time to make some art a few days a week and to journal... to touch base with me. Taxes are filed... don't hate me because me I'm fast and ahead, know that I've only done it this quickly because of the ever looming threat of loosing my house...<br />
<br />
I've had some fun experimenting with some new techniques and playing around. The good thing about art journals is that when your attempt fails, you can keep it to see what went wrong or just cover right over it with something not so "mistake-ish"-- Me, I keep the mistakes, because I'm a firm believer in learning from failure. But here are some of the pages that have really turned out the way I hoped... <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCz-5lmTeC9RZpbgjjGWwzPQyDrVKxv0u1miHpM5xl3ajl4idHlPSwGxCL2AqvSrqxjJcxpAmAm-qTv7EHOZO1pi79xv6LMFgtvrakKaRg7o2jxxv4RPvQU7J-NWYT7XXCCcNSI93D36ue/s1600/IMG_3997.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="240" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCz-5lmTeC9RZpbgjjGWwzPQyDrVKxv0u1miHpM5xl3ajl4idHlPSwGxCL2AqvSrqxjJcxpAmAm-qTv7EHOZO1pi79xv6LMFgtvrakKaRg7o2jxxv4RPvQU7J-NWYT7XXCCcNSI93D36ue/s320/IMG_3997.JPG" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgB7QkZuDyrRP7WNKnmz7IR23jJ0wwhVAVNQiOL7euUQ12jhKfBxIlCDi4DYznrSAT9wJs_tIBOu1cDpFHh4cSlX4EFnhNRwYWG9z4U5q46Uyi0RL-bqGlrAhyphenhyphenp3PjDIQi0auFMH42vJZGJ/s1600/IMG_4004.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="240" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgB7QkZuDyrRP7WNKnmz7IR23jJ0wwhVAVNQiOL7euUQ12jhKfBxIlCDi4DYznrSAT9wJs_tIBOu1cDpFHh4cSlX4EFnhNRwYWG9z4U5q46Uyi0RL-bqGlrAhyphenhyphenp3PjDIQi0auFMH42vJZGJ/s320/IMG_4004.JPG" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg98LPnJC3DtK4PIxXAqmidzm75Va0NCrHu8VvTkHywrRh8W-jnx5UwACaA2BzhAa1ZkRx78bzo2boZL996Di0w4GOD52uFHSnvu8x3NObEPJYhTP3vJJHT-jLfUpodFkl2OmGVZCRtgN3j/s1600/IMG_4006.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left:1em; margin-right:1em"><img border="0" height="240" width="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg98LPnJC3DtK4PIxXAqmidzm75Va0NCrHu8VvTkHywrRh8W-jnx5UwACaA2BzhAa1ZkRx78bzo2boZL996Di0w4GOD52uFHSnvu8x3NObEPJYhTP3vJJHT-jLfUpodFkl2OmGVZCRtgN3j/s320/IMG_4006.JPG" /></a></div><br />
What a blast. If you haven't taken a look at <a href="http://effywild.com">Effy Wild's</a> Book of Days project, I encourage you to take a look. It is a no pressure art journaling project that will last for a full year. Effy provides you with videos, feedback via a facebook page and emails. She's a ton of fun to learn with. I've paired up with her to offer a HUGE discount on <a href="http://www.theplanetyou.com">The Planet You</a> workshops as well as at the <a href="http://theplanetyou.com/shop">Planet You Shop</a>. For access to the discounts, you just have to register for Book of Days (which is totally free.) <br />
<br />
Life has been the same kind of crazy for me.. too much going on at work, too much drama at home and a general sense of malaise. I know that once the tree finally finishes shaking and I figure out if I'll be able to keep my house the rest of my world will also settle down. Until then, I'm just hanging on and doing my best to enjoy the ride-- though I'd be lying if I didn't say that some days, all this shaking makes me really unhappy and uncomfortable. As I work on my process of "coming back up" I am reminding myself to be gentle with my failures, to try not to lash out when I am feeling threatened and cornered, and to do the best I can with what I've got. It is not always easy to have those days when the best I've got is really not so good. But that's part of the art of surfacing... coming back up is hard work, and long. I'm not a patient person, so the "long" part is not my favorite. But here on Planet Kaere, I know that the way things are are the way I choose to see them... so I keep choosing to see them as an opportunity to learn and grow. <br />
<br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-68569190030278186162012-01-14T10:01:00.000-06:002012-01-14T10:01:33.799-06:002012... who knew?right, so... how many times have you heard "a new year, a new you?" How many times have you then succumbed to the sales pitch that followed... and proceeded to have a NOT NEW YOU? or worse, didn't succumb but sat around feeling guilty and worth less because you weren't ALREADY that you? Yeah... everything from Get rich today internet marketing to lose 100 lbs dieting... all aimed to tweak us right where we are weak and vulnerable and aimed, really, not at giving you a new you and a deeper sense of self but at your wallet. And the thing is... who doesn't want a bigger bank account, a slimmer body, a healthier lifestyle? Lord knows, I'd be right in line... if it were really about change. But the truth is, I don't really want a new me. I like the me I am. It took years to find her, to discover the paths she wanted to walk and get her moving on them, but I like her. Most of you know that I teach journaling workshops centered on the idea of talking to the "real" you... I believe that there is less a need for a "new you" than there is a need to discover and uncover the "real you." There's been a lot of talk out there about your "word for the year" (Much thanks to Ali Edwards for bringing her personal project into the world.) I chose the word "Surfacing" this year... a year long concentration on both the coming back up aspect as well as the clearing down to. For each of us, and for each moment and thing, there is a choice, somtimes with many options, sometimes with just a black and white option and sometimes it's a choice that doesn't feel like one-- option A. bad, option B. worse. I've spent a lot of time in the past year with many of the latter kind of choices... not much fun, but not powerless. So in this coming year, I am focusing on the necessary pairing down and the critical emergence from the muck. I have been working on the new <a href="http://www.theplanetyou.com">Planet You </a>workshops and am so excited about the new classes. I have been tagging along on <a href="https://www.facebook.com/groups/bookofdays/doc/297410423630075/">Effy Wild's Book of Days project </a>and am really enjoying the community of art-ers/ists and journalers. I am fighting my way back up-- and though the surface is still not clear, I am looking forward to breaking through again. You can sign up for the newsletter for Planet You and the Planet You shop by clicking the button on the right. Have a wonderful new year, and hey... let me know what word suits you this year.Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-68270250925206957152011-12-31T16:59:00.001-06:002012-01-01T04:15:20.025-06:00a shift in focus...Well... hi. Same old excuses, and I'm as tired of them as you are. So I'll skip the list. I'm sitting here at my desk with my brand new desk calendar (50 cents on clearance at target :) ) and thinking about the things that I believe i will face in the coming year... very few of those fill me with joy or peace, but there will be the new Planet You workshops, which I'm happy to say have just about pushed their way out of my head and onto the page... there will be days of art and writing, challenges met, laughter shared and all the wonderful things that come about with day to day living. And there is still the opportunity for a miracle... I've been hopping about facebook and websites today trying to find out where I signed up for an organizing your workspace workshop--- I deleted the email, have yet to receve a follow-up email, and have no clue where it came from--- yeah I need the help organizing :) And I'm seeing so many conversations about Word for the year... and while I'm never opposed to picking a point of focus, I'm thinking that what if, for a change, this time it's not so much about what is ahead but what I am leaving behind. That perhaps, New Years Eve should not be spent in anticipation of the coming year but rather in reflection on the closing of the previous one. I don't know about you, but 2011 was a hell of a ride. I redeveloped some old friendships, I met new people, I discovered my love of teaching art, I launched Planet You, I returned to making books and art. It has been a year of turning within to better enable me to reach out. I have set clearer limits on what I want and need in my life physically, financially and emotionally. I have asked for, received and given help. I have had my heart touched a million times in many small and large ways. This past year has been a soul defining time for me as i have made my way through the mess of every day life. There are still decisions to be made, roads to be walked and joys to discover, but wow... there was so very much accomplished this year. <br />
<br />
So... really, it's not that I don't have a focus for the coming year, but I'll happily share that with you tomorrow, when it is 2012. Today, take a few moments to grab your journal and make a list of the things that made 2011.Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-71446075468695288652011-12-03T18:38:00.000-06:002011-12-03T18:38:18.617-06:00the only person you can't kick out of bed...Life is... what it makes of you. Really. It isn't a well thought out plan, it may not even have a mapped direction and it is going to happen no matter what. I've been busy of late, with a lot of things, some important, some trivial, some just plain necessary, some good, some not so good. In the fight to keep my house, it does look like I'm going to lose, but I'm going to continue to try. I'm going to keep making art and going to work and getting up each day to be the best me I know how to be because... you know... the only person you can't kick out of bed in the morning is YOU. And whether I like it or not, this is the me I chose to be. While I clung stubbornly to the faith and hope that everything was going to somehow work out, I failed to be as careful and protected as I could be... so if this is what comes to pass... I can only say that I've had other choices for a very long time and didn't chose them. I have my reasons, excuses, and in some cases, no idea at all why, but the thing is, that while I am scared and sad, I am still the same me I've been busy becoming my whole life and it's time to remind myself that this fear and sadness are in the way-- I'm not getting the new Planet You workshops written-- they are percolating in my head, but I'm not writing yet. I'm not cleaning up in the house, nor thinking about christmas nor getting my envelopes ready and mailed for a swap I'm participating in. I'm not thinking about getting a christmas newsletter put together, or mailing Christmas cards. I'm avoiding my studio at all costs. I'm not being "me" with the people I care about and I'm being a bit casual with my own sanity and safety. These are all the ways I am busy telling myself to get over it and get on with it. Today, I think, might just be the day I listen. <br />
<br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-71306017069774960022011-11-30T18:34:00.000-06:002011-11-30T18:34:11.237-06:00November 30: What did you learn from doing NaBloPoMoNo big surprise here... I learned that I love to write... that when I get caught up in an idea, the words just come and come until I have to make myself stop... that sometimes writing feels like work and others it feels as natural as breathing... <br />
I learned that I do have the discipline to show up every day, even when it's the last thing I want to do and that when it is the last thing I want to do, doing it often makes it feel like something I DO actually want. I was able to relearn that I am not afraid to tell my stories. I was able to find other bloggers that I really enjoy. Writing every day, about something other than crafting, making art, or Planet You reminded me that I have so many other things to say, and to talk about... not that i don't love those three subjects... but that there is so much more of me to share. <br />
<br />
thanks, every one, who came along for the ride... <br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-15649101144280270512011-11-29T19:20:00.000-06:002011-11-30T18:26:11.563-06:00November 29: What is the last thing you do before going to bed?I sort of have a list of last things... I read before bed... every night. I write in a journal, many nights, but not every night. I check my alarm, every night, I tell my son, even if he is already sleeping, "Good night, I love you." I have a difficult time being a parent... for many it seems to come easily, but I really struggle with making time to be present with my child. I haven't a four year old sense of the world... I dislike repeating myself... I take no joy in playing Dinosaur Fights or having stuffed animal races... and I hope that he understands that no matter how hard giving him the "me" he wants can be, that I love him, love him, love him.Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-20330276584096952992011-11-28T18:20:00.000-06:002011-11-30T18:20:42.280-06:00November 28: Describe an heirloom that has been passed down in your family and what is its significance to you?Oh... well... this one is another doesn't really apply to me prompt... I'm adopted... so my family herilooms, and while there are plenty, are part of a heritage I do not share... I will say though that one of my mother's ancestors came over on the Mayflower, and we have his shoes... and i love those shoes... I even wore them once, to give a presentation on the MayFlower...Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-21907829457827075152011-11-27T14:53:00.000-06:002011-11-27T14:53:12.825-06:00November 27th: another prompt free daySo... life goes on, right? It does. And it does whether we are having our way with it or it with us. These days, life is having its way with me more than i with it, but still... it goes on... and here's where the magic is: I'm not keeping score. There are so many adages that apply here, but truly it comes down to nothing other than the choice to be willing to decide what is important and what we are willing to live with and/or without. My decision, and no, it is not always easy, is that being here to be a part of this great big beautiful mess we call life is what is important. And I am willing to live with and or without whatever it takes to be here.Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-3393117955269626922011-11-26T18:34:00.001-06:002011-12-03T18:27:27.158-06:00November 26: waiting for something that never comesToday has been one of those days where I long for the ability to yell with abandon; "Do Over" I've had a headache that won't let go, despite an extra mega dose of ibuprofen, and a nagging twitch in my stomach. I am irritable and tense. I kept checking the Blogher site for the writing prompt... totally forgetting that it was Saturday... and prompt free writing day... which spun me around to thinking about the time we spend waiting for things that never come. We all get stuck there, waiting for the right moment, or the next time, and somehow, those moments and times never seem to actually arrive. It is easy to set a destination but not always so easy to follow the course that brings us there. Me-- I'm easily distracted... a magpie flittering from this shiny thing to that... collecting experiences like baubles and getting myself all bogged down with ideas and memories and plans and not actually moving. I have these great ideas for projects in my head but I can't bring myself to get anything done. I want to reach out to a pretty amazing artist and talk to her about working with her on an online class-- I think our styles mesh well. I want to be free of being terrified about my house. I am one of those people who has the amazing ability to have faith even when things are really rotten. I have hope, even when all the facts point to hoplessness. I believe that there is nothing so sad as the loss of hope, except perhaps for the loss of faith... and so... here's what I know.... that while waiting for things that never come, other things maybe have the chance to come along instead... and if you aren't so focused on the thing you are waiting for, perhaps you'll be amazed by the things that come along in the meantime. The world is full of amazing people and opportunities... and it really is just up to us to reach out to them and for them. So as I've been talking about the things I need, people have been responding to those needs in whatever ways they can or feel the need or desire to... there have been wonderful messages, comments and emails of support, people have used the donate button, and I've been put in touch with someone at the SBA who might be able to help me with my situation there. When you reach out to someone, you never know how far reaching your touch may be. You never know how valuable your gift of kindness may be... nor how deep it's effects may go. So I wanted to take a minute to remind myself that the smallest act of kindness can be the most meaningful thing in the world to someone else. I wanted to give myself a few minutes of silence to ignore the headache and twitchy guts and be blessed by all of you that have allowed me to give freely and who have, in your own moments, given your kindness to me. I am awed and honoured to be a part of this amazing life. So I need to remind myself to stop and be silent, be thankful for all that I do have, and all that I am able to give, and all that I have received. <br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-62874128013329229022011-11-25T19:37:00.001-06:002011-11-26T08:41:45.218-06:00November 25th, Do you like to buy presents ahead of time or when you need them?An apt Black Friday question... I was so tired today that I actually left early... I thought that working thursday night and this morning at five am wouldn't be quite so difficult... but my brain shut down at about 8:30 am... by 10:30 I was bloody useless... I used to handle the lack of sleep much better than I do now. But back to the question... I tend to make gifts versus buy them, though I will purchase something when I see it and just "know" that it is the right thing for someone. I very rarely do any "last minute" shopping, and I simply don't understand the Black Friday madness--- there is nothing i need or want that would entice me into those crowds at those hours to fight with anyone over the last anything...<br />
I hope those of you who celebrated Thanksgiving yesterday had a fabulous day. I hope that those of you who did brave the madness today to shop, enjoyed your day... and as a retailer, I would like to say Thank You to all of you who made it point during your shopping experience to thank your sales people, to be polite, and to pass on your words of kindness to us. Whatever your job may be, stop and think about how you would feel if you were treated at your place of employment the way people treat those of us who work in the service and retail industries. We are real people with real lives who have chosen this industry because it suits our needs or skills or a combination of both. I spent well over a decade in the restaurant industry before switching to retail and nothing would aggravate me more than being treated like I was stupid or incompetent because I was a waitress or a bartender or even a restaurant manager. I'm really good at what I do... and I truly appreciate those of you who take the time to stop and chat for a minute, to say thank you, to respond when we speak to you. When i was bartending in New Orleans during Mardi Gras we were allowed to wear non-uniform shirts during parade nights and days. My favorite non uniform T shirt read "Server, Not Servant". <br />
The way you talk to people touches their lives... remember that when we stop to make eye contact and say "Hi, how are you?"<br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-32863020230318386182011-11-24T23:40:00.000-06:002011-11-25T19:21:18.153-06:00November 24, 2011, do you prefer to be alone or around other peopleNow... this one is also a bit of a sticky one for me... because, while I enjoy people and love to talk, I'm somewhat shy, and i deserately crave silence and time alone. I work in retail, and am a manager, so I have to interact with people on a daily basis on both a personal and professional level... and while I enjoy all aspects of my job, there are times, even during my work day where I simply have to walk outside and get away from the noise and the people-- and nothing has to be wrong to trigger that, just my need to create a little cushion of silence.... So I would say that the core of this is that I prefer to be alone... but I do enjoy time with other people when I can control the amont of time i have to be in that environment... and don't get me wron, it's not just staff and clientele, but also family and friends that I still need to separate from and get some down time. I'm a better me when I get time alone.Whispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-48814359315903990272011-11-23T20:20:00.002-06:002011-11-24T06:05:55.689-06:00november 23: write about a piece of music that changed your life forever...Oh, well... now this one is hard... for a few reasons-- I don't think any piece of music changed my life forever, but I also really love music and have a strong attachment to much of it... Music has always een able to change mymood, whether deepen the one I'm in or lighten me out of one i need to get out of. It allows me to feel a catharsis that I don't seem to find anywhere else, even in making art. The musi that comes to mind as life changing for me... Pat Benetar's Hell is for Children, Pink Floyd's Wish you Were Here and the Final Cut, Live's Run to the Water, Tori Amos' Crucify, Bob Geldof's I don't like Mondays, Depeche Mode's Blasphemous Rumours, Neil Young's Sugar Mountain and Helpless... hmm... Sugar Mountain... yeah... that perhaps is the one i would pick if I had to pick just one... it still brings me back to being twelve, to finding my voice the first time, and learning that even when everything was not okay, everything was going to be okay... I have the dubious honor of having had more than one song written about me and more than one written for me, and No, you've likely never heard any of them (unless you happen to be from the Boston Area and catch the local music scene towards Providence). <br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-51031387934344043262011-11-22T19:08:00.001-06:002011-11-22T19:11:31.963-06:00november 22, what is the luckiest thing that ever happened to you and whyHeh... this is really going to be a bizarre thing for some of you... but the luckiest thing that ever happened to me was being raped when I was seventeen. It changed my life, and though some of how it changed me, for a time, was really not lucky or pleasant, or healthy or even safe or sane, a lot of how it changed me, and how I changed because of it are some of the best things that have ever happened in my life. I directed the play "Extremities" in university, perhaps as a direct response to having been raped, but also because having spent four years working with and for the theatre department, I needed to dispell the myths I had about directing and directors. Had I not been raped, I'd have not likely chosen that show, and not then met my best friend and same-brain mentor. Had I not been raped, I'd have never walked completely away from the small little place where I grew up, became a city girl, became a someone not afraid to leave places, people or things. All the changes might have happened in other ways or by a different catalyst, but it was the catalyst I had and i consider myself lucky to have had a life changing experience that I was able to learn so much from and lose... only so very little in comparison. There's a lot more to say about this, but I'm just not finding my groove this evening... though I think I may have to revisit this post at a later date and give it a fresh write. <br />
<br />
Make somethuing beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-40059033336591447622011-11-21T18:37:00.001-06:002011-11-22T15:50:18.430-06:00November 21: Do you have a passion project?Well... I was going to sit and write this morning but the day got all turned around and now I'm sitting on some really bad news and just don't feel terribly passionate about anything at all. But, of course, for those of you that know me, and those of you that don't, <a href="http://www.theplanetyou.com/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #6aa84f;">The Planet You</span></a> is my passion project. Writing the curriculum, filming the video (which was really scary for me) interacting with the course participants--- that is all really amazing and it feeds my soul in an unbelievable way. I just can't get my heart around writing tonight though... For those of you that know me... you know I survived hurricane katrina-- the actual storm. I was in St. Bernard Parish, right outside of the lower ninth ward and twenty two feet of water came in. We took a disater loan with the SBA that has been on a hardship deferment for quite some time and that has now ended... and my payments have just been increased again-- to the point at which I cannot afford my home. I am saddened by this and scared about all the changes that it is likekly to bring about. Life here was just beginnng to make sense... Today, I am trying really hard to remember that this is part of a plan that I simply cannot see yet. <br />
<br />
Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-80847038128505274152011-11-20T15:07:00.000-06:002011-11-20T15:07:09.233-06:00November 20, The Thumper RuleRight... so, on prompt free weekends, I let my hair down a little and write from Planet Kaere... which these days, is a cluttered, jumbled up mess. And that's okay. I survive clutter, and chaos, and lack of sleep and a million demands on my time, skills, and whatever other spare or essential parts I have laying around. But what I don't deal well with is the stubborn refusal to learn anything and move forward. I don't deal well with those I refer to as "stuck on stupid" and yes... that's exactly how I say it. Or I ask the question "Who flicked your stupid switch?" and you know what... that's not really very nice of me. What it is is that I'm surrounded by people who want to ask a question instead of do the work to obtain an answer on their own. I think I've had to walk out of my building at least once a day ever day for the last two weeks so thatI could say, outloud, "I should not have to think for you, ffs, think it through and arrive at an answer, then ask the question 'Is such and such the way to deal with this?'" So... I'm a bit frustrated... because the people who are being paid to do the jobs that require thinking are not thinking, and my job, which requires planning and physically doing, is being interupted all the time to think for someone else. And that would be all well and good if for every minute I lost to thinking for them, they spent a minute doing for me... but it doesn't work that way. I just get further and further behind. So the thing is, that I often have to just call the Thumper Rule... "If you can't say sumpin' nice, don't say nuffin' at all." And it saves my sanity a few times every day. Because I get really angry at the questions that could be answered by walking ten steps and looking, or that I answered for you yesterday. Okay... so I'm a smart girl, and I tend to overthink things, but that doesn't mean that every one around me gets to stop thinking. And I work while I'm thinking, and if I get lost in the thinking only then do I get some help. So... the Thumper Rule... is one of those things I have to keep in my life because I can get down right nasty when I'm feeling pressured and one more person asks me one more question that is only being asked because someone else doesn't want to do the work to arrive at an answer. So when I sound exasperated when you ask me one more question, understand that it's not that I don't want to help you, but that I want you to help yourself-- and exasperation is much better than me saying what I'm thinking at that moment, which is something along the lines of--- oh wait... Thumper Rule. <br />
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Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5757320458929892279.post-13081202560755646592011-11-19T09:45:00.001-06:002011-11-19T13:24:23.109-06:00November 19-- prompt free weekends!So... as I've been focusing on keeping up with NaBloPoMo, my blog has lost a little of it's former direction, and gained a bit of a new direction... good things come from creating, and change always... well... changes things. I make art, but I call myself a crafter-- most of what I do is alter pre-existing things... I love to paint on journals, I love to make books. Long before I considered myself a crafter, though, I fell in love with words and language and the stories we tell. I think that many of us don't write because we are afraid of the reactions to the stories we tell... because we value our privacy or the illusion of us that we strive to maintain. I write because the me I wear is not always the me I am, and sometimes, the costume gets heavy. I write because I believe in records, I believe in leaving a footprint. I write because, as much as I'm most likely to be the girl in the corner who says nothing, I actually have a lot to say. I like being heard. I like making an impact. I like making a difference. This past summer, the idea to write The Planet You workshops kinda fell out of the sky and crashed into my office with meteor-like force. It grabbed me and shook me up and sat me down and said "you've got to do this." So I did. And i hemmed and I hawed and I asked for a lot of support from a lot of people... and out of their corners they came, to help me focus, to encourage me to go on. To help me with the technical aspects of putting together an online classroom, edit video, prepare myself to be someone a bit bigger than the me I am in my own head. It is easy, when things are tough, to forget that we have amazing talents and skills. It is easy, when things are hard, to think that we are alone and that no one really cares if we succeed or fail. It is easy, when things are scary, to think that we are too small, too unimportant to have enough strength to face the world. The easy thing has never been my way, though I'm as prone to moments of self-pity and sadness as the next guy. What it is, though, is that I believe that who I am is worth everything I have been through to be her, to be here. Even when "here" is a great big slippery mess. Even when "her" is struggling and hurt and angry and exhausted. Life is what it makes of you, not the other way 'round, but You are what you make of life. Love is everything. And I never in eighthundredthousandbazilliongajillion years thought I'd be the girl who not only believed that but also said it outloud, for everyone to hear. Love is the reason we are here, and I'm not going to the first person to say it, but perhaps, this will be the first time you hear it in your heart: If you don't love you, all the rest is pointless. I don't claim to be anything other than this girl who has "been there done that and lived to tell," and in many cases, more than once. But as I've been there and done that, I've taken a lot of notes, and learned a whole lot. The journey to you begins with a simple step... the same simple step many times... ask yourself a question, and tell yourself the truth. If you're looking to start that walk, or want some guidance and company on the way, I'd love to have you join me for The Planet You journaling workshops. View the introduction, free mini-course, and register <a href="http://www.theplanetyou.com/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #6aa84f;">here</span></a>.<br />
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Make something beautiful with your heart and your hands,<br />
KaereWhispers and Wisheshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00575087370505395897noreply@blogger.com1